This blog post is all about happiness. The importance of self-happiness, what exactly makes us happy as individuals and the reasons why it’s OK not to always be happy.
Although I may only be 20 years old, I have been through many difficult times, some much worse than others and some that I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to make it out of. It should not matter how old you are, each and every one of us still feel emotions of every kind; love, sadness, happiness, heartbreak, jealousy. Our mental health and emotional state is the most important thing. When thinking about myself, not only did I feel unhappy within myself, but also with the rest of the world.
It really did take me an incredibly long time to realise that time heals absolutely everything. It is impossible for us, as human beings, to be OK, 100% of the time. Everybody has days where they feel as though they can’t get out of bed and they don’t want to socialise with the world. Everybody has days where they feel down and worthless and unmotivated. Some people may just find it easier to hide through a smile. The cheery postman you see each morning; he could be having the worst day of his life. The cashier lady you see in your local shop who always smiles and says hello could be feeling a sense of loneliness that you have never felt before.
But then there’s the flip side! The cheery postman you see could have been through the hardest challenges, but something inbuilt inside of him has told him to wake up each day, do his job and be happy within himself. And that’s the most important point that I would like each and every reader to take from this blog post:
Happiness comes from within yourself.
It’s important to understand that events happen in our lives and we really do have no control over them, I know this is a frustrating thought, but we can’t ever change what could or might happen. And that isn’t the way to live! The knock backs we might face make us human. It does not matter how long it takes, but you will always be OK. We have an inbuilt ability to always find a way out of difficult situations, and to always come out stronger and learn from whatever has happened to us. We need to ensure that we give ourselves time, time to heal, time to move on from something that has hurt us or affected us in any way, time to become as successful as we want to be, and time to be truly happy.
Happiness comes from within yourself – you cannot be happy in your life if you do not love yourself. You need to be confident and proud of everything that you have already achieved, the situations you have been able to come out of and learn from are what makes you, you. You really can get through anything and achieve anything you want too, even though at some points you might not feel as though you can. Everything takes time.
These words are so easy to say, and it took me such a long time to convince myself that there was any truth in them. I realised that I had to take a look at myself and ask, ‘what makes me happy?’ I realised that I had been living my life through other people, and concerning myself with what other people thought and said and relied on them to shape the way my everyday life was going to go, rather than concentrating on myself. By doing this, most of the time unintentionally, I lost all my confidence and any self-worth I once had. I never put myself first in my own life, and when I think about it in that way it sounds so ridiculous. It’s so easy to lose yourself through hard times, but you need to figure out what makes you genuinely happy.
I love being creative, I love writing, reading, colouring, creating random things, and for a very long while I stopped doing all of that. But why shouldn’t I be doing the things that I love? If you love dressing in crazy, colourful, flamboyant clothes, do it! If you love dancing, do it! If your dream is to fly planes around the world, do it! You can do anything you want if you tell yourself you are going to be successful and if it makes you happy. It’s the most important thing to ask yourself what really makes you happy and do something to change it, it may have taken me a few years to realise this, but it truly was the best thing I ever did.
But please remember, it’s OK to not be happy some days. It’s normal, and you’re not alone. Things are always going to get better, even when they feel as though they never will. I know a lot of things you may hear sound so ridiculously hard to believe. But right now you might be in a situation that you think you won’t survive. However, six months ago you were in another situation you thought you wouldn’t survive, but you did. Even two years before that, there was something else going on around you which you thought you wouldn’t survive, but again, you did and you’re still here. Living your life to the fullest. You can always make it through anything, but the only way to do that is to put yourself first and never live your life for other people.
Only you can make your life better in whichever way you want too and once you have that figured out, somebody you love will then come along and complete everything. But until then, don’t ever let anyone try to drag you down, tell you anything different, knock your confidence in any way or stop you from doing the things you love and adore.
Each and every one of you deserves to be happy, but it has to start with you and your self-happiness!